Dysregulation in Different Domains

And the ripple of a single activity

A week ago, my friend Kelly Wilde Miller published a book called Creative Dysregulation. The next day she entered a 10-day silent meditation. Talk about a mic drop.

So she has no idea how the book is landing. The curiosity would kill me. I can’t imagine sitting in silence in the wake of releasing such a vulnerable project.

But that's not even the craziest part of the story. It's the fact that she wrote the book in five days. After being challenged by Paul Millerd to write a short book in less than a week, she actually did it.

I pre-purchased it because I thought it was a cool story (and I like Kelly). I downloaded it because I was curious about what someone could create in five days. I finished it in 24 hours because it was shockingly good.

I keep stumbling upon people talking about it on social media. Multiple friends have texted me about how much it surprised and motivated them.

And that's the part that I find most inspiring. By publishing it, Kelly unleashed a wave of excitement and energy. It's disrupting people's perception of what’s possible. It's inspiring action. People with the seed of a book in their head are thinking... "maybe I can actually write it."

But that's just the starting point.

There is also the impact of all the ideas in the book. Plus, the second and third-order effects of the ideas that get shared by people that Kelly inspired to write their book or release their creative project.

For example, let’s dig into the core idea in the book.

Creative Dysregulation

Kelly defines Creative Dysregulation as “the inability to sustainably and reliably create without a mental, emotional, physical, or spiritual crisis along the way.”

As I read Kelly’s story, I thought about my own creative journey. I remembered all of the times that I flew too close to the sun. Instances where creative projects fizzled out or led to burnout.

I thought about all of my friends who suffered through similar challenges. And then friends who seem immune to dysfunction in their creative work.

I realized that sometimes these friends were dysregulated in other areas. They might be able to create effortlessly but struggle to consistently exercise or sustainably save money. Often, our challenges are not only deeply personal but domain-specific.

Take a look at how Kelly describes the impact of creative dysregulation:

“the inner imbalances that disrupt an individual’s ability to consistently engage with their creative work… hinder the fluidity, productivity, and fulfillment of the creative process, as well as one’s ability to see themselves as a successful creative.”

I see this exact same dynamic with so many people and their relationship to exercise.

Dysregulation in Fitness

The difficulty is not in learning new physical skills or completing hard workouts. It’s in how these activities bump against inner wounds and habitual patterns. These “inner imbalances” then “hinder the fluidity, productivity, and fulfillment” of exercising.

This manifests in different ways. For some, it’s perpetually starting a new fitness activity in a blaze of enthusiasm, only to flame out within a few weeks. For others, it’s stubbornly suffering through a routine they don’t enjoy, frustrated by a lack of progress.

In either case, the experience prevents people from “seeing themselves as a successful” exerciser.

The similarities between these challenges with fitness and Kelly’s stories of creative inconsistencies are striking. The problems may feel wildly different but the solutions can be quite similar. Many of Kelly’s recommendations for overcoming Creative Dysregulation also apply to exercise.

And this is what I think is so inspiring.

The Ripple

Not only can we learn from other people’s journeys to overcome their creative (or fitness) dysregulation, we can learn from ourselves. We can bring our experiences from a domain of success into a domain of difficulty.

The beauty of learning to thrive in our creative work or our fitness routine is that it gives us meta-skills we can apply everywhere. It strengthens a growth mindset that is universal. It brings awareness to inner dynamics that may be holding us back elsewhere.

To me, this is the most powerful lesson in Kelly’s story.

It’s the way in which a single activity like writing or exercising can unleash a ripple in ourselves and the world around us.

Snowflakes ripples in the pond behind our house

---

Thank you for reading. If you have any reflections or questions, please reach out in the comments or by replying to the email.

p.s. Kelly’s book has not only inspired this post but a few creative tweaks. After months of talking about it (sorry rob hardy 🦌 and Lou Tamposi), I’ve updated the name of this substack publication to “The Ripple by Sam Sager”.

This captures the essence of how the ideas I’m exploring weave across domains and activities like exercise spread across our lives. The visual of a ripple has always been in the logo for Intuitive Fitness and has captivated me since childhood.

It feels like a fitting way to create a container that sits above all of my projects and points toward the essence of what I’m writing about (reconnecting with the body, learning from nature, nurturing renewal, etc) and working on more broadly.

Lastly, after reading Creative Dysregulation, I’ve begun working on a short book on Intuitive Fitness. Thanks Kelly! More to come.